Have you noticed that when our buttons are pushed or when we feel ‘off-centre’ or ‘not ourselves’ – we feel kind of pushed around like seaweed floating in the waves – being swept away with each movement or wave that comes along. When the movement stops – we feel somewhat washed out, exhausted or wonder what had happened?
Movement and change is fantastic, it helps us grow and learn more about ourselves and life in general. Sometimes when things happen beyond our control or pushes our buttons – we either try harder to ‘stabilise’ what is happening through our thoughts, actions and emotions OR just get swept away with the commotion and feel overwhelmed, anxious or tired/fatigued afterwards. When this happens, it can feel like being thrown in a washing machine, being spun out of the speed or direction that we are comfortable with, then spat out at the end… feeling tired and exhausted, as if you’ve been run over by a truck.
Why does this happen? From my own experiences, sometimes we look for stability in our environment, our routines, particular people in our lives. Its like seeking to be anchored by a familiar setting or people to feel that sense of comfort and “ah, everything is all going to be OK” feeling.
This way of ‘anchoring’ or what some call it ‘grounding’ works for a while, in various stages of our lives. For example, as we grow up as children, coming home to our mum/dad cooking dinner gives us that sense of familiarity or comfort regardless how traumatic our day has been. This works for different periods of our lives, such as in our childhood, but like life – everything changes. That is the only constant in life.
So back to our example. As we grow up, our parents grow older and may not cook the way they use to. Or even treat us in the same way that they use to – as we, both parent and child, tend to change and think/act differently accordingly. So what happens then? What happens to our need for anchoring or grounding? Do we turn to other people or environment for that sense of ‘comfort’ or ‘peace’? Likewise, do we turn to ‘routine’ for this sense of grounding. Going to work/school the same way to have that sense of familiarity and comfort – but as you know, we all grow up, move out of school or work – and then we have to learn to adapt again.
With our everchanging environment, it is hard to find something or person that can ‘anchor’ us in what feels good or comforting – and that is always there for us. To help us move and grow with all the changes around us, yet still be anchored in our true essence of ourselves. ie living out what is important to us, fulfilling our life purpose and our fullest potential.
So instead of being washed away by any change or movement, imagine we can be like grass growing in the fields- rooted in the soil (our true selves) and yet the blades of grass are free to move with the changes.
A true anchor that can never disappear is in our ‘stillness’. To sit in stillness, is not to sit rigid, forcing ourselves to be in a position that is not comfortable or to control our thoughts till they are the ‘correct thoughts’ to be had. It is to sit in the true essence of ourselves, watching our swirling thoughts & emotions and eventually feel that sense of space and peace of who we are in that current moment. We are able to be comfortable with ourselves, regardless of what happens externally, as we remain totally accepting of who we are and currently at.
This doesn’t mean, we don’t do anything and sit in a cave. It means to enjoy and embrace who we are currently, being comfortable with our body, our thoughts and emotions – knowing that it is all temporary and always changing too. Appreciating and enjoying the experience on all levels – that we do have.
Sometimes we have such a ‘static’ view of who we are or should be, we forget to allow ourselves the time and space to just ‘be’. Stillness is in the cessation of the judgements of ourselves and allowing us to be as we are. (Note, I have used ‘cessation’ and not ‘stopping’.) Judgements of ourselves or our environment creates a distance between where you are currently at and where you feel you need or want to be. When the judgement is surrendered, then, there is only one place to ‘be’ – comfortable with ourselves as we are AND allowing ourselves to get on with things that DO inspire us and makes us feel good without the ‘stresses’ or ‘commotions’ of life.
I called this blog, ‘De-Pressing Our Buttons’ to acknowledge that there will be times that our buttons will be pushed – but the good news is, that we have the choice to ‘de-press’ it. Lately, some of us have had our buttons pushed. When this happens, we have a tendency to go back to our past memories, when we experienced these emotions last and re-live those emotions and events. Its kind of like, reminiscing old memories but these ones were ‘less pleasant’. Our mind goes through the archives and brings back the vivid images, emotions and thoughts of the last events as if we were there again.
The great news, is that we are not actually re-living the past event and that we have a choice of how it effects us this time. Holding onto the past event, will just lead us to the same ‘after taste’ of the experience we had last time. But if we realise that this time our buttons are pushed, that we are a different person. Perhaps stronger or wiser person that CAN handle the situation in a more effective or lateral manner so that it doesn’t need to upset us as it use to. ie. allowing our buttons to ‘DE-press’. We are free to experience something different, or perhaps build a better relationship with ourselves or others. Realising its a new experience and allowing us to have a ‘new’ re-action to the experience can feel liberating and perhaps even enjoyable!
So have fun next time your buttons are pressed, its an opportunity to re-live the past but also have the strength and courage to overcome or handle the situation better, now that you are a different person.
Meditation courses with Connie Mah will re-start May 13th Thursday 7.30pm, Hampton.
Connie Mah is a Spiritual guide and Coach that uses her clairvoyant gifts to work with individuals in a group environment to help let go of old thinking patterns and habits – to live an inspirational and purposeful life without the ‘stresses’ of everyday life. Topics covered are tailored to specific needs of group.
Book Now, as spaces Sell Out quickly.
Course is limited to 12 spaces to provide Personal Attention to Individual Needs.
Bookings: firstname.lastname@example.org or call Connie 0404 830 533.